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Writing Craft Practice: Character Development

1 Sep

Character development is the art of making a character feel real and complex – to humanize them through the page with motivations, weakness, fears, quirks, backstory, and growth. Excellent character development is achieved when reader understands and empathizes with why a character acts the way they do, not just what they do. Chances are, any character you love (or hate) is because the author took careful consideration into their arc (or tragic fall). 

A portrait made entirely of books to resemble a man in profile. An open book with fanned pages forms the head and and hair, book spines create the beard, and stacked books form the body and arms. A curtain is drawn back on either side, and a rolled scroll or manuscript hangs at the bottom like a hand.

Every character you love (or hate) is because the author took careful consideration into their arc or their tragic fall. Perhaps the most powerful, universal examples are Ebenezer Scrooge or Darth Vader. We see the wounds both hold and how he became the way he did. In Ebenezer’s case, his hatred of Christmas is rooted in Dickens’ revealing and careful transformation of the character, layer by layer and interaction by interaction. In Darth Vader’s case, his manipulated and mechanized evil, is tragically shown to be eating away and what little sanity and will Anakin has left in him, holding onto his guilt and grief as the only remaining strings to his humanity.

That groundwork involves these building blocks:

Core: Their personality. What are they like?

Weakness: What’s their flaw, some part of their approach to life that could be their downfall?

Personal Need: What does the character need to learn/do to overcome their demons?

Interpersonal Need: What does the character need to learn/do to heal their relationships with others?

Goal: What is the character trying to accomplish in this story? This needs to be concrete and measurable. To be happy is vague and undefinable. To take the ring to Mordor and destroy it is measurable and something we can root for.

Desires: Abstract things the character may want in their life in general. What they wish for, what they dream of, what they think would make them happy if they had it.

Fears: What the character is afraid of, either general or specific.

Interests: What fascinates your character. How do they spend their free time?

Quirks: Small details that make the character more human. (Perhaps a habit, hobby, catchphrase, or peculiarity.)

Values: The character’s principles. What matters to them.

Skills and abilities: What your character can do, from small skills to, if relevant, magical abilities, combat skills, negotiation tactics, etc.

Circumstances: The situation when we first meet them. Example: Harry is living under the stairs with his horrible aunt and uncle.

Social Standing: Rank or position this character has in the social environment they belong to.

Background summary: Where did the character come from and how did it shape them?

Run a character through these (doesn’t have to be all) and you’ll find your characters become more rounded and someone you can care for and root for.

But what story only has one character in it? Not many.

Stories with multiple characters tend to have a character development craft issue creep in, and you should be aware of it so that you know how to spot it and avoid it.

Head hopping is a POV shift violation—drifting between different characters’ thoughts, feelings, or internal experiences within the same scene without a clear break, which distracts the reader from “getting to know” a particular character and staying focused on their development.

Further clarity on how the two can collide: character development makes head hopping tempting because, if you have more than one character in a scene, the thought process can be to develop all those characters at once. Three characters, for example – John, James, and Susie – rightfully deserve their due time and right to develop on the page because each deserves their own development.

Our instinct is to show the reader everything. In the example below, you’ll see that Jack is mad, Susie is excited, and James is exhausted.

But your job as an author is not to show everything, but what is most relevant to the reader and your story at that moment. And what is most relevant is how your point-of-view character is seeing the world and developing in a given scene/chapter. Strong character development is rooted in what the POV character can actually see, hear, smell, taste, and touch. Other characters develop and are revealed through action and dialogue of whomever your POV character is

Non-negotiable rule: One POV character per scene or chapter. Want to change POV? Move to a new chapter or insert a clear chapter/section break. You need to make it clear to the reader.

Where head-hopping is allowed depends on your POV:

  • First person (I/We): head hopping is a no-go.
  • Third person limited (He/She/They, tied to one character): head hopping is a no-go.
  • Third person omniscient (an all-knowing, floating-above narrator): head hopping is okay — readers already expect it if you’ve established that narrative voice from the start.

How to Spot Head Hopping

James’s eyelids grew heavy. He was desperate to sleep. Jack glared from the chair, his chest burning with anger because the night was being cut short. But Susie’s mind…oh, hers raced with excitement at the thought of movies and ice cream all night long.

Why this is head hopping:

  • James’s POV: the reader experiences his physical sensation (eyelids grew heavy)
  • Then Jack’s POV: the perspective shifts to Jack’s emotions
  • Then Susie’s POV: the perspective shifts into Susie’s head (mind raced with excitement)

What fixing this might look like:

James’s eyelids grew heavy, and he was desperate for sleep after three hard hours of practicing baseball. Across the room, Jack glared at him, eyes narrow and nostrils flared.

“But we need to practice,” Jack said, stretching the last word with a groan. “The big game is in one week. Let’s just turn on the yard lights. We can get a few more drills in. You’re being lazy!”

Susie jumped in quickly. “How about we watch Disney movies and eat ice cream? We’re a great team and deserve a night of relaxation. Working ourselves to the bone isn’t a good thing.”

James’s eyes sprung. “My mom just bought mint chocolate chip. I’ll go grab it.”

Jack’s anger and Susie’s excitement are still there, but we are staying in James’s head the whole time, which creates a much more cohesive experience for the reader.

Best Practices & Self-Editing Checklist

Run through these thoughts while writing.

  • Is it possible for my POV character to actually know this?
  • Are they assuming something they’d need to ask about or hear directly?
  • Are they stating a fact it’s not possible for them to know?

Do your best to avoid head hopping, but don’t let it slow down a first draft. When ideas are flowing, plot points are boiling, and your characters are taking you down unfamiliar side roads… just write. Save this level of vigilance for editing and revisions.

Prompts to Practice:

1. Two strangers are stuck waiting for their appointments (you chose). One is nervous and trying to hide it. The other is impatient and has somewhere else to be. Pick one of them as your POV character. Through dialogue or observation, bring out your POV character’s development and also let the other’s nervousness and impatience come through

2. Two siblings meet to discuss a family secret. Give each character a different desire, goal, and want going into the conversation. Perhaps one wants to protect the family and the other wants to destroy it. Write a scene from just one of their perspectives, and let the other’s motivation reveal itself only through how the other character sees/hears it.

3. Three classmates are trying to divide tasks on a class project. Expose each character’s weakness that is highlighted by the tasks needed to be done. Write the scene so the reader can see the other two characters’ weaknesses from their behavior alone as witnessed by your POV character

After any of these, run the self-editing checklist for what you’ve written.

Suggested Books with Strong Character Development and POV

Comment below your thoughts on if this post was helpful or if there is anything you’d like to see in future posts on writing best practices and the craft.

Hit subscribe to get weekly updates on posts from the Hoboken Public Library!

Written by:
Sean Willey
Information and Digital Services Assistant

General Writing Craft Titles (To get inspired and immerse yourself, whether your pursuits are authorship or to better understand good storytelling.)

Book: Save the Cat! Writes a Novel by Jessica Brody

Book: Mastering the Process: From Idea to Novel by Elizabeth George

Book: On Writing: A Memoir of the Craft by Stephen King

Book: Bird by Bird: Some Instructions on Writing and Life by Anne Lamott

Book: A Long Game: Notes on Writing Fiction by Elizabeth McCracken

TV: The Great Courses Writing Great Fiction

Audiobook: The Writing Life by Annie Dillard

Audiobook: Structuring your Novel: Essential Keys to Writing an Outstanding Story

Audiobook: The Anatomy of Genre by John Truby

Audiobook: The Business of Being a Writer by Jane Friedman

Audiobook: Writing Series from Sandy Marsh (multiple step-by-step titles through the writing process)

Audiobook: Writing Fiction: A Guide to the Narrative Craft

Writing Workshops and Program Options at the Hoboken Public Library

1. Write and Share: Prompts and Projects

Whether you’re drafting a novel, developing a short story, exploring a new idea, or simply hoping to practice your writing skills, this space offers the chance to put words on the page alongside fellow writers.

Prompts for each meetup are themed and sent to registrants the morning of, so that they can develop ideas and thoughts for the evening’s gathering. These prompts are optional for those looking for a creative spark. Writers are more than welcome to focus on their own projects, too. This is time set aside to help us all get closer to reaching our writing goals.

To join us or if you have questions, please email sean.willey@hobokenlibrary.org.

2. Writers Group

Get input and constructive feedback on your writing project in a friendly and supportive environment! Meets once a month.

If you are working on your next project—whether it is a novel, short story, memoir or poetry—our Writers Group is a great place to get input and constructive feedback on your work! Our supportive group of fellow writers can help give you insights you need into shaping your work for self or traditional publication.

Email hplwriters@gmail.com for more information.

Writing Craft Practice: Show vs. Tell

18 Aug

Show vs. Tell is perhaps the most common rule a writer hears when asked how to improve their writing. It’s a rule, rightfully so, that causes angst and confusion. But it shouldn’t. Its common (everyone does it!) and fixable. It’s about training your eye to see it and then how you can fix it.

A fantasy illustration of a young child gazing at an open book and a magical is coming to life from it. It shows a blue flower, a tiny ladder leading up to a moon, miniature horse riders, and grass and rocks.  The background is a dark forest with silhouetted gnarled trees and warm amber light glowing.

Question: How can you show everything? You can’t (or shouldn’t).

Question: Why is telling a bad thing? It isn’t, but this is where storytelling moves from chit-chat with your mates to an actual story that exposes morality and emotion.

Telling Definition: Telling is stating information directly (emotions, facts, traits, etc) without letting the reader experience it.

Showing Definition: Showing conveys the same information but through movement – action, dialogue, sensory details, behavioral patterns, etc.

How do you spot it?

​Example: James threw the ball vs. James reared his arm and launched the new baseball deep into the field. It was the last gift she’d ever given him, and he was glad never to see it ever again.  

“James threw the ball” works, but if the sentence is designed to evoke emotion, let’s say anger, then showing is better here.

Think of it this way: your friend asks, “Tell me about your day,” so you say I did X, Y, and Z. Perfectly fine, and you answered the question, but let’s say it was a really tough day and you want to ensure your friend understands the emotions and psychological development you triumphed over to get through it. Then…you would show your day.

  1. Telling creates distance – the reader is informed rather than immersed.
  2. Showing builds trust and authority with your readers, allowing them to become emotionally invested and drawn in so they can draw their own conclusions and let their “mind’s eye” develop.

Whether you’re writing a short story, novella, or novel, this is ultimately what you want.

Note: Showing is not always better. Sometimes telling is. A character moving from point A to point B is a good place to tell, unless what happens in that transition is important, such as a car crash, flat tire, strange encounter, etc. (This also applies to world-building. You can tell the reader that day turned into night, unless the transition holds something significant in it or you want to set a mood/tone.)

It’s acceptable to say “she drove home if that’s all she did. No need to bog the reader down with how she started the car, checked her windows, etc.

How do I edit telling into showing?

A few questions to ask:

  • Am I naming an emotion or action directly that could be better shown as movement or dialogue?
  • Would the reader have a better experience if they felt what was going on as opposed to simply informing them?
    • Is this a moment worth slowing down for (show) or a transition I need to move past quickly (tell)?
    • Example: James was mad vs. James’s cheeks went red, the vein in his forehead throbbing, and upon his narrowed eyes stared into the unexpected house guest with laser focus.

Kind Reminder: If you are undertaking a short story, novella, or novel, don’t analysis-paralyze yourself to exhaustion with show vs. tell. In paraphrasing Stephen King, “Write with the door closed and edit with the door open”, meaning first drafts and free-writing are just about getting the story down. Acknowledge the rule as you write, but don’t beat yourself up about it or ache after writing every sentence to make sure it follows this rule.

Save this ‘looking through a microscope’ vigilance for revisions.

Mythbuster: “show, don’t tell” doesn’t mean never tell. For perspective, a novel averaging at 80,000 words (300 pages) should shoot for 70% show and 30% tell. And some genres, such as Fantasy and Sci-Fi, rely more on this rule than others.

Prompts to practice

1. Showing Emotion

A character receives news that makes them anxious. That can be whatever you like, but you are not allowed to use the word anxious, nervous, worried, or rely on sentences that say, for example, John was X (emotion). Instead, your character’s body, actions, and dialogue should carry the scene and show the emotion.

The goal: To train your writer’s mind to not name the feeling but find a physical or behavioral way to show it. (Bonus points if you can find a way for this to create further conflict or tension for your character.

2. Showing Character Traits

Your character is stubborn. Without using the word stubborn (or its synonym) and through action or dialogue, show the character’s stubbornness.

The goal: Your reader should finish the paragraph knowing this is the character’s trait without being told it.

3. Rewriting to Rid Telling in Favor of Showing

Take these three telling sentences and transform them into showing:

“He was exhausted.”

“She didn’t trust him.”

“The room felt heavy and tense.”

A Recommended Show vs. Tell Craft Book

Understanding Show vs. Tell (and really getting it) by Janice Hardy Ebook on Hoopla, Audiobook on Hoopla

General Writing Craft Titles (To get inspired and immerse yourself, whether your pursuits are authorship or to better understand good storytelling.)

Book: Save the Cat! Writes a Novel by Jessica Brody

Book: Mastering the Process: From Idea to Novel by Elizabeth George

Book: On Writing: A Memoir of the Craft by Stephen King

Book: Bird by Bird: Some Instructions on Writing and Life by Anne Lamott

Book: A Long Game: Notes on Writing Fiction by Elizabeth McCracken

TV: The Great Courses Writing Great Fiction

Audiobook: The Writing Life by Annie Dillard

Audiobook: Structuring your Novel: Essential Keys to Writing an Outstanding Story

Audiobook: The Anatomy of Genre by John Truby

Audiobook: The Business of Being a Writer by Jane Friedman

Audiobook: Writing Series from Sandy Marsh (multiple step-by-step titles through the writing process)

Audiobook: Writing Fiction: A Guide to the Narrative Craft

Comment below your thoughts on if this post was helpful or if there is anything you’d like to see in future posts on writing best practices (This post, I admit, is highly focused on fiction writing.)

Hit subscribe to get weekly updates on posts from the Hoboken Public Library!

Written by:
Sean Willey
Information and Digital Services Assistant

Writing Workshops and Program Options at the Hoboken Public Library

1. Write and Share: Prompts and Projects

Whether you’re drafting a novel, developing a short story, exploring a new idea, or simply hoping to practice your writing skills, this space offers the chance to put words on the page alongside fellow writers.

Prompts for each meetup are themed and sent to registrants the morning of, so that they can develop ideas and thoughts for the evening’s gathering. These prompts are optional for those looking for a creative spark. Writers are more than welcome to focus on their own projects, too. This is time set aside to help us all get closer to reaching our writing goals.

To join us or if you have questions, please email sean.willey@hobokenlibrary.org.

2. Writers Group

Get input and constructive feedback on your writing project in a friendly and supportive environment! Meets once a month.

If you are working on your next project—whether it is a novel, short story, memoir or poetry—our Writers Group is a great place to get input and constructive feedback on your work! Our supportive group of fellow writers can help give you insights you need into shaping your work for self or traditional publication.

Email hplwriters@gmail.com for more information.